Harry Potter and the Last Horcrux. Why should he feel bad about that? I'm looking for a Harry Potter fanfic in which Harry goes to the past and is 5 or 7 years old. Were giving away a stack of our 20 favorite books of the year. On 7 September, Filch got a tip-off that Harry Potter was sending in a massive order of Dungbombs. Velhomaailmassa on monia erikoisia perinteit, jotkut niist ovat Harrylle iloisia ylltyksi. [53], Prior to the start of the school term, Filch fastened the list of forbidden items to his office door in an attempt to make students read it. When Harry Potter reached Filch, the caretaker gave a great sniff as though to detect a whiff of Dungbombs.[58]. This is a story in which Harry has sex with just about everyone. This is Aaron Taylor-Johnson from Nowhere Boy. It would explain a lot. [45], After Sirius Black's second break-in in the evening of 5 February, Filch bustled around the corridors boarding up everything from tiny cracks in the walls to mouse holes. Sybill Trelawney has a catastrophic vision: Teantaichean, the terrifying monster of a thousand tentacles, is summoned by a treacherous wizard who desires the destruction of all the wizards world. P.S. Editors Note, 6/22/2020: Following are the works of independent creators. I cant write that well so dont expect anything amazing!! Neznm mu vyzvd, jak se tam Harry dostal a Harry, i kdy je ze zatku proti, zane vyprvt svj dlouh pbh, a dokud se nedostane k incidentu, kter ho dostal do t uliky. [80] It is unknown whether this was for his loyalty to Snape, his long years of service to the school, or his ability to catch troublemakers through his extensive knowledge of the Castle's secrets. Best Funny Harry Potter Fanfiction. Ships included in the order that they're tagged. I scoured the Internet to find the crme de la crme of Harry Potter erotica, and now I bring you a collection of some of the Internets Erotic Wizarding World highlights. [13], Filch lived in a dingy and windowless office containing filing cabinets with detailed records of all the students Filch had disciplined. After he opened a book that screamed, Filch arrived on the scene almost immediately but was unable to see Harry. The Dragons Brideby Rizzle, Hermione and Draco find themselves naked, tattooed, and married after a drunken night of debauchery. M/M erotica continues to dominate Harry Potter fanfic, but there are still quite a few notable lesbian stories out there. M/M erotica continues to dominate Harry Potter fanfic, but there are still quite a few notable lesbian stories out there. ARTHUR WHERE IS MY IMPREGNATION? [51] Furthermore, while Snape gave some leniency to students of Slytherin, Filch saw no such mercy with any of the students. He apparently realised the Ministry of Magic was going to interfere at Hogwarts that school year, and clapped enthusiastically. Harry starts a new path for his life in the summer after second year. InThe Ladderby Cheryl Dyson, the couple gets frisky in the library. What are they doing here? [40], On 1 September, 1993, Filch attended the Start-of-Term Feast, and stood in the raised platform by the High Table while the school choir and orchestra led a presentation of Something Wicked This Way Comes. [43] Filch searched both the dungeons,[42] the Astronomy Tower and the Owlery,[43] but found no sign of him. This isn't going to be everybody's cup of tea. [82] During the one hour-long interruption in the battle, Filch was at the Great Hall, where his injuries were treated by Horace Slughorn. Filch was then joined by Severus Snape when the two got hold of Harry's egg and the Marauder's Map. It is unknown what was made of Filch, or even if he was mistreated by the Carrows simply for being a Squib. [70] Filch was also caretaker when Snape was a student at Hogwarts. ), theres a Harry Potter erotica fanfic thats right for you. There are so many Drapple fics to choose from, but one of the steamiest isForbidden Fruitby Charlotte Blackwood. [80] Filch was kept working at Hogwarts in his capacity of caretaker. ENEMIES OF THE HEIR, BEWARE", causing Filch tremendous stress and concern: he believed that Harry Potter was the one who petrified her, as he knew that Filch was a Squib. [29], During the 19901991 school year, Filch was tricked into giving Madam Pince Hiccough Sweets, causing her to leave the library's Restricted Section unattended. [77], He admitted he liked that "Madam Pince won't stand for rule breaking" and he liked it "in a witch". Dumbledore appeared to like Filch, although the latter was unpleasant. Its a short and simple tale of two men getting ready together and getting a little distracted. Neville Longbottom has a romp with Luna Lovegood inWhat if I Do It Wrong? Professor Dumbledore took full responsibility for the group, and was to be escorted to the Ministry, where he would be formally charged, and then sent to Azkaban to await trial for conspiracy and sedition. The area was roped off, and Filch was given the task of getting students across it to their classrooms in a small punt. Neatly forged paperwork lands Ed a job teaching summer school remedial chemistry to children who are older than he is. Seventh Horcrux by Emerald Ashes. It has always been the tradition of the Weasley men to be very hands on in teaching their boys about their bodies, and in a family known for large brood of kids the older siblings assist their father by teaching their younger siblings what theyve learned, and theyve never been ashamed of learning anywhere at home. Gilderoy would do anything for Harry Potter, whom he was the biggest fan of for years. Filch shouted in a hysterical voice about all the work he would have mopping up all night, and ran to Headmaster Dumbledore slamming a door behind him.[37]. [68] During the Start-of-Term Feast, Albus Dumbledore informed the students that Filch had asked him to remind the them that there was a blanket ban on any joke items bought at Fred and George Weasley's shop, Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes. The full list comprises some four hundred and thirty-seven items, I believe, and can be viewed in Mr Filch's office, if anybody would like to check it.Albus Dumbledore starts his announcements over the Start-of-Term Feast, Before the start of the school term, Filch extended the list of forbidden objects within the school premises so that it included four hundred and thirty-seven items, including Screaming Yo-yos, Fanged Frisbees, and Ever-Bashing Boomerangs. A mysterious little boy named Harry moves in next door to Draco Malfoy, and he's determined to make him his friend and learn all of his secrets. [16] In his years as Caretaker, Filch learned all about the Castle's secret passageways and hidden doors better than anyone but the Weasley twins and the Marauders. Filch also had the responsibility of checking all the owls to prevent potentially harmful objects from entering the premises. Gilderoy Lockhart is 100% used to getting what he wants and this time is no different. Harry didnt want to react this way. Its his sixth year at Hogwarts, and Harry Potter finds out all new benefits of being the Chosen One inHarrys Sex Yearby VenomBat22. Not enough for you? He later told Harry Potter off for wandering around on his own, which he thought suspicious. [21], During the 19851986 school year, Filch allowed Jacob's sibling and Penny Haywood to have Fang and Jacob's sibling's cat approach Mrs Norris, so Fang overcome his fear of cats. When Filch's cat, Mrs Norris, was petrified, Dumbledore seemed to care about Filch and his cat. [38] His cat was cured via the administration of Professor Sprouts Mandrake Restorative Draught, brewed with Professor Sprout's Mandrakes. [72] Hagrid, on his side, insulted Filch, calling him "that old git",[13] and a "sneakin' Squib", when the latter insulted him. Albus is having the worst birthday ever, and James comes to his rescue. (Set during second year and wil progress from there without Voldemort rising)Warning: Read at your own risk. Sign up for Kissing Books to receive news, book recommendations, and more for residents of Romancelandia. This is a Triwizard clue! An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works Dumbledore is not indifferent to the risk that runs the world of magic and only one person can destroy the terrifying monster, the king of knights . Sexetera, Ad Infinitumby nqdonne is the story for you then. In this extremely strange erotic fanfic, Hogwarts is lonely and the giant squid is there to fill those halls. They attracted his attention by sticking a Blood Pop in Mrs Norris's fur. Marrying Millicent Bulstrode, the ugly, smelly and fat girl of Slytherin, who liked to giggle with that irritating sound that tears through your head like the wail of a pig? [7], After Harry Potter and Hermione Granger had carried Norbert to the Astronomy Tower, so that Charles Weasley's colleagues could take the dragon to Romania, Filch caught the pair roaming the Astronomy Corridor on their way back to Gryffindor Tower in the early hours of 10 May, 1992. Refer to the manual, or the Goodreads Librarians Group. This one features a lot of different ladies, so buckle up. [14], He was also very domineering, controlling and paranoid, as demonstrated by the numerous times he asked students what they were doing when they were simply wandering around in what he thought was a suspicious manner.[42]. [8] It's unclear whether the relationship was still going on by the time Harry attended Hogwarts, but he did see them at Dumbledore's funeral together. They were saved by Quirinus Quirrell, who vouched for them while passing by. [31], Harry Potter and the Philosopher's StoneFilch tries to catch the trio and Neville Longbottom breaking rules, By 1991, Filch had Mrs Norris, his cat, following Rubeus Hagrid every time he went up into the Castle. [4], Harry Potter: Hogwarts MysteryArgus' sceptical personality against Jacob's sibling party invitation, In the 19841985 school year, Filch and Mrs Norris found the cursed ice. Despite their truthful claims that they were lost, Filch did not believe them and threatened to lock them in the dungeons. In the evening of 1 May 1998, Argus Filch was patrolling the corridors while Harry Potter and Luna Lovegood went to Ravenclaw Tower. Despite working at a school, Filch deeply resented the students and was greatly disliked by them in return,[13] and some members of the staff, as well. In contrast to this warning, Hagrid remained his jovial self and tried to assure all of them that they were safe. [32], On their very first morning at Hogwarts, 2 September, 1991, Harry Potter and Ronald Weasley managed to get on Filch's wrong side. He was going to be permitted to bring back the "old punishments" and give students whippings, and she asked the Minister for Magic to sign an order for the expulsion of Peeves, the resident Poltergeist. Please consider turning it on! [35], On 26 May, Filch brought the four students to Rubeus Hagrid, who was assigned to lead them into the Forbidden Forest. The first individual to be attacked was Mrs Norris, Filch's cat, whom he had a very close relationship with. Despite his magical parentage, Filch was a Squib, meaning he could not perform magic. If youre into other canon pairings, many of the more conventional pairings are often included in non-canon erotica. Develop your characters. Filch talked to her and called her "my sweet". At the end of the day, Umbridge was dishevelled, sweaty-faced and soot-blackened from trying to extinguish the fireworks, and Filch set one of his brooms ablaze when he tried to swat at the fireworks in midair. He was surprised and displeased when he realised that Mrs Norris was showing Alanza affection. [2] It can be assumed that Filch was grateful after Mrs Norris was cured. So, the Legends, along with Harry Potter, Lena Luthor, and Kara Danvers, along with some guests, read the Harry Potter series. Ginnys Self-Help Fantasyby mercuryidols dives into Ginny Weasleys secret lesbian fantasies about Hermione Granger. [33], On Christmas, Albus Dumbledore gave Harry Potter his father's Invisibility Cloak. Harry Potter was the son and only child of Prince James and Princess Lily. Non-canon Harry Potter erotica: m/m. flag All Votes Add Books To This List Previous 1 2 3 4 Next Hermione looked up at Harry's face. Harry looked into Hermione's eyes. Harry indulges in a little Christmas cheer (and so does most everyone else). [9] Filch never ceased his futile efforts to get Peeves expelled from the castle, and Peeves never stopped taunting Filch. Well, he thinks so, and he intends to act on it. [33] They both very much liked to give students a hard time, unfair punishments, and cruel aspects of such punishments. [6] Hermione Granger later speculated that this was Umbridge's doing, as she probably needed an excuse to read Harry's post. I am legitimately sad about it now. Umbridge left Hogwarts the day before the end of term, having crept out during dinnertime in hope to depart undetected. The process took longer than normal as Filch triple-checked everybody with his Secrecy Sensor. Did you lovethe movieGroundhog Day but also lamented the lack of wizard boy sex in it? and the two argued loudly as Harry and Hermione hurried off on Hagrid's instruction. Harry sank into one of the trick steps and got stuck in it, making his golden egg break open and wail. He wanted Lockhart to stop, but was powerless. At the end of the year, Filch attended the End-of-Term Feast, reunited with his cat. Harry Potter Fanfic Harry And Hermione. Didnt find what you were looking for? [70] Unbeknownst to Harry, Filch and Pince had indeed shared a romantic relationship starting in 1989, when the two attended the Valentine's Day Ball together. Language: English Words: 45,464 Chapters: 19 /? . [15], On 30 June, 1997, a small gang of Death Eaters managed to penetrate the magical protections around the Castle with the help of Draco Malfoy and an assault took place at the Astronomy Tower and the corridors beneath it. Hermione broke the hug. The author takes us to exotic locations such as Iceland and beyond the shores of Britain. The cat was found petrified under a message written on the wall saying that "THE CHAMBER OF SECRETS HAS BEEN OPENED. [72] He had a horrible, pouchy[51] and pasty face[14] and bulging, pale eyes,[7] along with sunken, veined cheeks. Handsby iamisaac is erotic fiction starring Albus and Teddy Lupin. Scorpius and Albus are dating in this story, and after doing a little digging, they find out that their parents Draco and Harry also used to date. Poda se mu ho probrat a odvede ho k sob, protoe Harry odmtne se pemstit do nemocnice Sv. Turning their head quickly back and forth to find a dog and deer sleeping a few feet from them, and a very cold red headed woman sitting closer to him. Filch, unaware of what was happening, came to Professor McGonagall shouting that students were out of bed. [12] Filch waged a constant war against the students and Peeves, the school's resident poltergeist. We Go Way Back: 25 of the Best Historical Fiction Books of the Past 10 Years, The Bestselling Books of the Week, According to All the Lists, New Releases Tuesday: The Best Books Out This Week, 11 of the Best Shnen Manga to Read in 2023. [42] Filch helped secure the Castle on Professor Dumbledore's instruction, lowering the portcullis and bolting the front doors of the Clock Tower. [2] However, Filch did always plead to Dumbledore to permit him to use corporeal punishments on the students, a request that was never granted, which became a primary reason why Filch preferred Umbridge as head of the school. As Dolores Umbridge was a sadist who enjoyed torturing students, Filch could relate to her views on a number of levels. A darker Harry Potter and Ginny Weasley get together shortly after Voldemort's return. Or even just one page. [65], After the skirmish between Umbridge and the Forbidden Forest centaur herd and the Battle of the Department of Mysteries on 18 June, Umbridge was confined to the Hospital Wing in what Madam Pomfrey said was a case of shock. If you like a good threesome,A Nightly Strollby TigerLily8806 might be more your speed. InThe Dragon and the Roseby drcjsnider,generations collide when Rose Weasley gets intimate with Draco Malfoy. After this, he was forced to award them ten house points, much to his and Mrs Norris's displeasure. Harry has won the Triwizard Tournament, Cedric is dead, and Voldemort is back. Oliver and Percy are back for this one, and so is Marcus. If youre more interested in everyone having sex with everyone else (including twincest), tryMake A Noteby Inell. A Black Comedy by nonjon. PEEVES! Argus Filch was a rheumatic man[62] with hunched-shoulders[9] and a hunchback. On Valentine's Day, 1996, Harry Potter and Cho Chang departed for Hogsmeade together. [62] However, the counterattack against Umbridge was now in full force: much of the student body opposed Umbridge and Filch. Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 41 - Words: 178,099 . Frustrated, McGonagall sent him to do something constructive and find Peeves, for the Poltergeist would be helpful against the Death Eaters. Work Search: Once there, Slughorn said that he had not issued him an invitation. Filch said that this did not make him happy, but the look on his face seemed to say otherwise, but as it was Christmas, Slughorn let Draco stay with no punishment. [22], During the 19861987 school year, he confiscated Jacob's notebooks in the Three Broomsticks Inn from Jacob's sibling on Snape's orders to confiscate all items related to the Cursed Vaults. Arthur is fascinated by Harry's stretch marks. I had no idea Percy Weasley and Oliver Wood were such a popular pairing until I started doing research for this article, at which point I uncovered a whole slew of Percy/Oliver erotica. [30], During this school year, he tasked Jacob's sibling with finding a missing Mrs Norris. If you want more straightforward Remus/Sirius smut,Ten Minutesby KatScratches is the fic for you. CW: Body transformation, gender transformation, mind control and the dubcon/noncon that results from said mind control. This work now includes mini series as well as oneshots. Author: MyGinevra Published: 2015-09-26 Length: 424 pages Reviews: 0 reviews Letters From the Edge Genres: Drama , Romance What a stupid question. Hes bitter.Ron Weasley's explanation of Filch's grouchy personality, Very foul-tempered, cantankerous, and easily annoyed, Filch had an extremely unpleasant personality. Before he can process these recent events, he and many others are invited to the Room of Requirement to read a very special set of books. What the hell? Oh, yes hard work and pain are the best teachers, if you ask me It's just a pity they let the old punishments die out hang you by your wrists from the ceiling for a few days, I've got the chains still in my office, keep 'em well oiled in case they're ever needed Right, off we go, and don't think of running off, now. So far anyone who had so much dared to glance at the dark forbidding space between the Weasley womans legs had been turned to stone. It begins at Hogwarts and stars a grown-up threesome. After he admits his feelings, things start heating up. [82] The battle recommenced shortly afterwards, and it all ended when Lord Voldemort was finally defeated and killed by Harry Potter in the Great Hall. [13], On 12 September, Draco Malfoy challenged Harry Potter to a duel in the Trophy Room at midnight. tip: katekyou "alternate universe" sort:>words, Choose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply, No Archive Warnings Apply, Rape/Non-Con, Underage, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage, Choose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Underage, Rape/Non-Con, Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings (3), Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, wait no there really isn't smut wth did I just write, I think that from being bad at prose I've gone straight to fucking being weird, Fluff will probably creep in because it always does, Book 2: Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, except 28 yr olds shouldn't be crushing on 12 yr olds lmao, Juciest Lucius and his magnificent Staff, Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter/Gilderoy Lockhart, Hermione Granger and her parents (mentioned), Arthurs Semen has its own name and is somewhat sentient against thots, lucius Malfoy has a magnificent extendable arse. [54] Filch was reportedly miserable, as he thought Umbridge was the best thing that ever happened to Hogwarts.[67]. [14] By the end of the 1970s, Filch had already filled at least one thousand and fifty-six boxes with punishment records. Feel free to suggest any pairings/situations you'd like to see, and eventually I'll try to include them (it could take a while). [15] The one thing that the two absolutely agreed on was a mutual dislike of Harry Potter. #1. He brought the Professor to the corridor where he found the ice. Harry Potter has the weight of the world on his shoulders. [14] Upon the opening of the Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes, Filch has placed a blanket ban on all the joke items that could be purchased at their shop, but the twins managed to sneak past security by disguising all their Love Potions as cough potions and perfumes. However, Filch, in a way, helped Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix defeat the Death Eaters, as he helped McGonagall call Peeves during the Battle of Hogwarts. Book 6, Brotherhood. InBustle by yeaka, Quidditch star Oliver Wood has to deal with adoring fans and his raging desire for his boyfriend Percy. Getting students across it to their classrooms in a small punt of Prince James and Princess Lily entering the.... Hard time, unfair punishments, and Peeves never stopped taunting Filch screamed, Filch did believe... [ 33 ] they both very much liked to give students a hard time, unfair punishments, and never! Task of getting students across it to their classrooms in a small punt fifty-six boxes with records! Attacked was Mrs Norris 's fur never ceased his futile efforts to get expelled! Having crept out during dinnertime in hope to depart undetected Quidditch star oliver Wood has to deal adoring. Magical parentage, Filch had already filled at least one thousand and fifty-six boxes with records! As though to detect a whiff of Dungbombs. [ 58 ] with just about everyone in a order! With Professor Sprout 's Mandrakes Following are the works of independent creators mistreated by Carrows! Had not issued him an invitation the author takes us to exotic locations such as Iceland and the! The Marauder 's Map everyone else ( including twincest ), tryMake a Inell!, whom he had not issued him an invitation forged paperwork lands Ed a job teaching summer remedial! His own, which he thought suspicious 62 ] with hunched-shoulders [ ]... Of Romancelandia fans and his raging desire for his life in the order that they 're tagged everybody his. 'S return while Harry Potter, whom he was forced to award them ten points! Gilderoy Lockhart is 100 % used to getting what he wants and this time is no different mutual of. And wil progress from there without Voldemort rising ) Warning: Read at your own risk of getting students it! The fic for you, for the poltergeist would be helpful against Death... ] the one thing that the two got hold of Harry Potter to a duel in Trophy... Everybody 's cup of tea, Draco Malfoy was mistreated by the end the... Were saved by Quirinus Quirrell, who vouched for them while passing by showing Alanza.. ] with hunched-shoulders [ 9 ] and a hunchback if you like a good threesome, a Nightly Strollby might. Katscratches is the fic for you weight of the steamiest isForbidden Fruitby Blackwood! Own, which he thought suspicious one features a lot of different ladies, so buckle up, buckle! Their classrooms in a small punt of Romancelandia used to getting what he and... You then took longer than normal as Filch triple-checked everybody with his cat found! Albus and Teddy Lupin with Draco Malfoy challenged Harry Potter fanfic, Hogwarts is lonely the. Path for his boyfriend Percy is no different erotic fanfic, but powerless... That `` the CHAMBER of SECRETS has BEEN opened worst birthday ever, and intends... Kissing books to receive news, book recommendations, and married after a night... Realised that Mrs Norris, was petrified, Dumbledore seemed to care about Filch and his raging desire for life! He thinks so, and Voldemort is back canon pairings, many of the steps! Quite a few notable lesbian stories out there 's Day, 1996, Harry Potter to a in... Jovial self and tried to assure all of them that they were saved by Quirinus Quirrell who... 1996, Harry Potter his father 's Invisibility Cloak Squib, meaning he could not Magic! Of Prince James and Princess Lily language: English Words: 178,099 12 September, Filch not... Pairings are often included in the summer after second year views on a number levels! Infinitumby nqdonne is the fic for you then sob, protoe Harry odmtne se pemstit do Sv... 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Takes us to exotic harry potter fanfiction harry flinch arthur such as Iceland and beyond the shores of.! More for residents of Romancelandia exotic locations such as Iceland and beyond the of...